you can't be friends with the opposite sex

i feel sick to my stomach. i feel like i've done something wrong, very wrong, and i've done absolutely NOTHING.

in a nutshell, i have been associating with someone of the opposite sex. and associating isn't a metaphor for something else, i have literally just been talking and not just that, it's been strictly work related.

oh what a mess i've made.

this guy, let's call him 4, knows a lot about the job i'm going into. I will sort of be working with him when i begin, but not in the same building. since he knows everything, i thought it would make sense for me to ask him about the job and the ins and outs. (no pun intended)

4 is great... but 4 reminds me of someone else, not an ex boyfriend, not my brother (eww), but instead he reminds me of myself. I look at him and think he would get along fantastically with my friends and he makes me cry with laughter. i've said a gazillion times before to 4 and people we work with; '4 is a female version of me'

now i think he likes me. well, not so much think, i'm quite certain. he just invited me, which is what has sparked this post, to his best friend's birthday. it just made me think of when A and i had been together for a while and he announced to me that he had decided that he was ready to 'present' me to his friends at his christmas parties and birthdays. hehe, i still can't think of him saying that without giggling, i love when people whose second language is english speak so properly.

i could be reading waaaaay too much into it. but i don't think i am, i think i'm correct.

what i will miss (or not miss) from the youth centre...

things i have done over my period of time at the youth centre:

-asked young people when they last had sex while giving them condom after condom knowing they won't use them
-held a young person's tooth in my bare hand while blood gushed from her lip onto my arm (yes, i tested myself, all good)
-witnessed young people ram their heads against brick walls in anger
-listened to parents who have no one else to talk to speak of their children for forever on end
-given insulin injections
-been vomited on by a newborn (it was a good excuse to go to myers and buy another tshirt)
-been the mediator of so much teeny bopper gossip on youth programs
-been hit with footballs, tennis balls, yo ho diabolos, foam missiles etc
-been covered at one time or another in pva glue, glitter, sequins, staples etc
-been the object of lust for some twenty something boys (as in, they lusted after me, not the other way around)
-had my desk lost amongst the most enormous pile of art supplies i could ever imagine... had to take off my shoes and literally jump over boxes to get out.
-some other horrible stuff that is coming to mind that i shouldn't write on my blog


my achievements:
-broke the photocopier at least 5 times (i think 4 of those times were within one fortnight)
-tried to fix the photocopier once with my boss and a screw driver set only to REALLY break it
-drank at least two thousand of the two thousand one hundred and sixty litres of water we've ordered over the last 2 years
-got paid to work out how much water i've drank on the calculator haha
-been the instigator of fake gossip when i've been bored
-been the passer on of quite a bit of real gossip
-been a large part of the cause for getting facebook blocked
-lied to my boss / her boss / unit leader / manager / mayor at some time or another to cover for someone else

first for everything...

i went christmas shopping (well, not really, my sister C. went shopping and I, the chauffeur, dragged my feet along behind her) at highpoint last weekend. And i witnessed something I'd never seen before.

I saw two guys walking hand in hand, laughing, then one turned to the other and gave him a quick peck on the lips. They smilled at each other, and kept on walking.

I am very anti homophobia. I have quit a job before because there was a moron who i had to work closely with that used to bash homosexuals and once pushed a couple of guys into the yarra because they kissed in front of him and his son. he thought his son might get ideas. he told me with no remorse that if his son was gay he would never speak to him again, and also get divorced because he knew his wife would continue to talk to their son.

I am disgusted that this is the first time i have seen a same sex couple kiss. There are so many teeny boppers nearly having sex with one another on level one at highpoint, and that's ok because they're hetrosexual? so 10% of the world need to stay silent and to themselves? what crap...