eyebrows

again, i was forced to go out because 'now that you and A. have broken up, you need to get out!' this was even enforced by my parents, shockingly. that's because they don't know how disgusting meatmarkets aka clubs are.

so i was at work all day friday complaining that i didn't want to go out, and i just wanted to stay at home and read. when i got home, before jumping in the shower, i inspected my eyebrows and realised they were in depserate need of waxing. out comes the wax pot, into the microwave.

25 seconds i don't want to go

20 seconds i like my cousin, D. (who was taking me out), but her friends...

15 seconds her friend L. shits me up the wall

10 seconds ugh, if L. comes tonight

5 seconds i'll scream

i did my eyebrows while thinking about D.'s friend L., who is the most socially retarded person i know. i smeared a little bit of wax under the arch of my left eyebrow as i remembered the time when L. nearly ran up the back of my car because she is such a ditz. when i placed the cotton over the wax i must have been really frustrated and pressing way too hard, because when i ripped it off i looked in the mirror...

'What the fuck?' i said to my reflection. i looked down at the cotton in my hand and there was half my eyebrow in the wax. thinking about L. made me press and smear the wax onto the rest of my eyebrow and i proceeded to wax it off. it was a great start to the night!

i am dangerous

i was reading Leilouta's blog about how she once injured her husband by poking him in the eye by accident and i thought 'wow, at least i only injure myself, i've never done that to anyone else... oh shit hang on a second, yes i have'

i was at williamstown beach with my sister C. and her best friend J. For those of you who have never been to willy beach the sand is very fine and dark and very much like mud when wet. the three of us were in the water up to our knees picking up the sludgey sand and throwing it at eachother. we kept missing but it was great fun. until... i threw it towards C. while her back was turned and at the last second she spun around and received a handful of sand in her open eye.

she started SCREAMING. Everyone was staring. i had to drag her back to our towels and pour water directly into her eye. there was so much in it i couldn't see any of her eyeball. i was petrified that i had blinded her. to top it off our next door neighbour from home suddenly appeared right next to us and was staring at C. screaming. i knew she was thinking 'what a horrible sister'

how embarrassing

i was walking down mt alexander road to meet my friend C. to have lunch with her and these two workmen beeped at me.

well, i was pretty happy, because that hasn't happened since high school. we used to walk in a group down sunshine ave and count the number of beeps we would get. i guess that doesn't happen anymore because i drive everywhere now.

anyway, so i'm there with a goofy smile on my face thinking 'i am so cool'... then i tripped over NOTHING and nearly fell on my chin.

when i told A. this he didn't even hardly respond. He is so used to it. i even had a dream last night that i was looking down at my legs and they were covered in little bruises from falling over.

maybe i have a middle ear infection ... one that has lasted the last 23 years hehe