why italians are not our choice

after the arranged marriage proposal my parents put forward to me, i saw my cousin who had actually asked her parents to find her a boy. upon my parents telling her that he was italian, she scrunched up her nose and said 'oh no, i'm not marrying an italian.'

'why not!?' all our parents cried in unison.

'for three reasons. one, he'll cheat on me. all italians our age think it's the normal thing to do. all italian guys have a girlfriend and a mistress. i don't want that. two, they all speak like morons. i don't want to be correcting my husband every day for the rest of my life because he says 'wif' instead of 'with'. they're all born in australia anyway, so they just like to sound stupid. and last (i pissed myself laughing when i heard this) i'm very family oriented, and i need to find a husband with no family, because i'm not giving up on seeing my family at all, and that way if he has no family we can both just go to my stuff. no italian boy has no family. so i don't know who i can marry.'

i don't know either!